Toby

Poor guy was sick the past few days. Yesterday, his fever was high, 102.5 and I think even higher at times. It went down each time we gave him Tylenol, but would spike back up 4-6 hours later. Then, this morning he didn't have a temperature and I thought we were good to go. That is, until I was heading out the door for work. Toby started fussing, and then his breakfast returned to the table. It was a long morning of that. I changed outfits twice and had to change Toby three times if that gives you any idea. I'm not sure why 3 year olds can't hit a bucket...

Fortunately, he is feeling much better tonight. He ate dinner like he hadn't eaten in weeks, and has kept it down. He got his bath and is now in bed. I think we've passed through the worst of it.

On another note... I think we had a breakthrough this week with Toby as well. A breakthrough I didn't see coming. I have never questioned our attachment. Things have always gone very well, and I believe that Toby attached very quickly to our family. I have not ever questioned that. But what happened this past weekend was still so very special. The words for mom and dad in Korean are Umma and Appa (various english spellings). We usually use those terms to talk about his foster family in Korea, since that is likely what he called them. Well, we were laying in our bed, Toby, Nate and I and Toby turned to me with this serious look and said "Umma?" He has never really called me that, ever. It just hit me really hard. Like he had put the connection together, and that I wasn't just this lady named "Mommy" that he has called me for nearly 15 months, but that I was really his "Umma". Then he turned to Nate and said "Appa?"

I may be reading too much into it, but for me, it just felt like Toby had made a connection at a level much deeper than he had before. Like he had confirmed to himself that he was home. He has called me Umma several times since then. And it just melts my heart each time!

God is Good!

Haircuts!

Well, I know haircuts don't usually warrant a blog post, but in this case... I think it does
This is a big deal! Toby has been home for over 8 months. People continue to ask, and do so often, "how is it going?" While I'm excited about peoples interest, I wonder what kind of response they are expecting. I think so many people hear horror stories of the transition. They really are curious about how it is going for us. I never really know what to say. My usual response is "God is Good, and he has answered all of our prayers about Toby's transition". And that is the honest truth.

All of the things we prayed about... things we heard about happening to other people... like dealing with the time change, eating problems, chronic ear infections, sleeping issues (okay maybe that has been an issue!), attachment, etc., have not really been an issue. It has been amazing to see how God could take this little guy, from halfway around the world, and make him such a perfect fit for the Mills' family! From the faces he makes, to his sense of humor, to his eating preferences and personality... He is a Mills!

Back to the haircut...this has still been a transition for him. And over the last few weeks, we have seen amazing progress. The haircut yesterday was not his first. I believe it was his 4th... but... it was his first BY HIMSELF! Up until now, just placing him near the chair he would scream. Yesterday, he couldn't get up there fast enough! He sat there like a champ, the entire time. It nearly brought me to tears.

Another thing has been his attachment with Nate. This has been a slow process, and sometimes a painful one for Nate, I'm sure. But lately, Toby has been going to Nate on his own, with me in the room and climbing up into his arms. It is priceless!

So while things have been going good! And Toby has been doing well.. we continue to see improvements.

God is Good!